Trying to sleep but can't. Changed my life tonight and am wondering if I trust myself to get me through the next chapter. The uncertainty in life is like a fly landing right on my banoffee pudding. I can't stand not knowing and I can't stand anything that comes between me and my bananarooney.

In bed ... again ... where I seem to spend most my days and will probably be staying in bed as much as possible - it's the only place where I can't feel safe and warm AND I'm listening to Radiohead, I'm a fan alright. For the way I feel this very minute they have to be the best pick of the bunch to match the mood. Remind me of my bud Matt - what a guy. Met him on the first day of uni. Sat with him since then. We were dweedle dee and tweedle dumm. Friend for life. k I'm mumbling and now I don't feel like writing my thoughts down. Might message Mattyboy instead. I'm out. Kbye.

I got run over today by this crazy kid. He was like four years old and biked right round the corner like a bat out of hell straight into my shin. Sweet lord I squealed like a piglet being chased around a pig shack knowing he was gonna be sunday lunch. Seriously hurt like anything. Just my luck hey, my shin is flippin' throbbin like anything. I think it's bent too. I've got a dinted bent shin now. Goddamn great.



But I did have this really bloody delishy banana and chocoloto sauce for puds this afternoon which eased the pain just a smidgin. And after an evening of walking around a flee market with a hot choc to warm my cockles, a quick watch of Blades of Glory (where I was soooo close to peeing my pants thanks to Will Ferrel's antics) and eating half a jar of pesto, and now I'm reminiscing all my most precious moments that I've spent doing foolish things on this ol' planet. AND now I'm craving a batty chatty. Core it sucks moving to a new country at the beginning and having a limited number of friends. Time really should get its skates on and speed up this friendship making before I decided to live under a rock and be an unsocial git. Alrighty enough ranting. I'm off for one of those 8 hour snoozes. Anyone else out there - sleep tight and don't let those guitar strings strangle you in you sleep. I'm being serious. Some crazy cat told me a horror story last night about how those evil looking porcelin dolls come alive and scratch you to death in your sleep and me being the mongoose that I am started imagining my guitar coming to life and strangling me with its strings.



I couldn't sleep so I put outside my door. There was no way ho zay that I'd be able to sleep after thinking about killer guitars. I need a bodyguard to keep watch over me when I go for sleepies. It's bloody crazy I tell ya, my imagination really does get the better of me. Ok really off now.

Holey moley I am a lazy schmuck. Just in bed chilling watching The Mighty Boosh with my black pants still on my head. Caught a glimpse of me as I totted to the potty and boy do I look an ejjit. I personally like the look... jokes jokes, naaah not really but but really. I do like the feeling of wearing a “hat” though. You’re probably thinking why the hell is that berk wearing black pants on her head. Welllllll it’s a long story. I’m joking, it’s pretty short really - you see I need the pants because my room doesn’t have good blinds and well, Sara canny sleep good when it’s too light so thought the panties were a flippin good idea. Works like a dream, took a while to get use to it but you just need to make sure the pants aren’t too big or they just wriggle off you head. I’ve found the perfect pair.

Anyways right, I’ll let you into a lil secret, since being in Berlin all I wanna do is lie around in bed all day long. I’m just soooo not my usual flippin’ self, you know the constant fidgeting, singing away like Wacko Jacko in my head and writing those ever so essential “to do” lists. But I gota pull my socks up me thinks or else I’m just going to waste lifey away nurturing my laziness like it's a bonzai tree so I’m making my list to do for today right now.

It’s only doing stuff like unpacking all my shizz and making me feel homely in my flatty and then other stuff like clean out kitchen and stock up the fridge and crikey – buy bananas. Hell, who know’s what life’d be like with out my daily dose of beeeeeenane, crikey imagine that. Don’t wanna. Anyways – when I look at my list to do, all I wana do is roll over in bed and and grumble “nooooo lord why meeee why meee” and then I think "core blimey, I need a fairy who fancies helping me out" and then I find myself thinking “you are a berk” and then I just get up, bite the bullet, and crack on with my chores. Do ‘em quick and it’s not so painful, still painful, but the small pleasure of sitting on a sparkly non stinky potty is just one of many that comes to mind. I could list more but they get more and more ridiculous.

Oh yeah – random peepz keep saying hello to me on Skype...is this normal? I don’t think I know them so I just keep on declining. In my head I’m like who the hell would sit there on a nice day looking for people to bother on Skype??? Not me I tell you. I’ve got faaar more important stuff on the agenda aaah who are we kidding – you’ve seen my list to do. Still I’d rather snooze then search for buddies on skype, you never know what you’ll get do you. Might get a crazy cat or someone freaky. Yeah so I just keep on batting those DECLINES back like I’m on the tennis courts.

OK I’m going to cut my extremely satisfying procrastinating short, even if I could rant on all day long (being a woman – that’s pretty easy and all), and slip into some clothes and shimmy my ass slowly through the ol’ list and then probably take me out for a lil baklava lava – mmmmmm so yummy. I loooove the baklava. Kbye.

P.S. Woop de doo! Cheers bud for the comment I thought it was just me here blogging away like a story telling monkeyman and minding my own business but that's awesome. Well, it's already made today a happy day.

Just call me Betty the Bag Lady ...or Billy No Mates. I'm stuck between the two. You see tonight I wanted to get the hell out of my old evil flat and get the hell into my heavenly new one...but it seems I have had an incredible amount of bags and unfortunately a lack of friends. And the peepz I know here were all busy or goddamn unreachable. So tonight was rather eventful. Not only was I kaaaanackerooneyd from a day in the field but I ended up making three trips back and forth moving in.

I really don't know anyone so unlucky and clumsy as moi. So to add to the growing list of unbelivable incidients.... the garden gnome and whatever else has happened to me lately, we can also add tripped over big fat bag into the wall and ripped the ol' work pants right on the butt. I caught a right good look of a cheek in the mirror beeeehind me. That was a nice treat. NOT. So anyways, the pants are gonna have to be binned :( boooooo. And I either have brown kack ones which me no likey or quite fancy pants which I would look perhaps a weee too smart in. Probably just wear my own clothes over the next few days.

Oooooo I bought me a guitar. Woop woop woop. I'm gonna learn and sing and be happy because lately I've realised just how much importance I place on finding people to make me a chappy who's happy but really the responsibility lies in my hands. I need to make me a perky perkerson and like - live life to the glass half full and not half empty. So from this moment onwards I'm gonna take matters into my own hands and woah, I bloody love Elvis. Can't crank it off. Return to sender. Choo choo choooooooooneo. Love it aiight eat that. Yeah so happy happy happy. Despite whatever clumsyness comes my way, no matter what some people say, no matter what - I will wear a smile, even if I am breaking inside. And do you know what that means - green eggs for brekky tomorrows mmmmmmmmmm yummy. Gotta be strong for all that malarky.

K I'm goosed. Lying in bed and typing is more taxing than you know after trapsing across town 3 times and singing not just in my noggin but outloud - no more shy Sara J. Nopey nope I was singing loud n proud whilst waiting for the Ubahn. Naturally a low song - still can't hit those high notes. In any case sucks ass all that carrying dude. Just gonna listen to forvever young, love the version by the youth group and the sleepies. Foooook I want a hug and a banana jokes jokes, I'll have me one for brekky. kbye