AMERICA FUCK YEAH
Bought me a lil bread into work and BAM got me a banana butty. I sooooo know what I'm having for brekky tomorrow morning AND I've saved some bananas for a banoffee pie. Gonna make me a big phat banoffee pie this weekend and eat it all and it's going to be gloooorious.
Aaaah weekend sweet weekend. Working throughout the week makes me really appreciate the weekend. I can't say I actually get up to much, just sitting in coffee shops dinking T and eating cake and then just going out drinking and dancing...the usual carry on of a young person wouldn't you say. This weekend it's gonna be exceptional. I can't go wrong - movies, popcorn and banoffee...panorama bar when the fathead bouncers let us in and snoozing galore. Can't wait. Can't wait to just chillax.
Man, with all this chillax chat makes me realise I'm missing peepz at the mo. Maybe I'm going crackers but I'm missing my hugs. Usually I get at least 5 a day - dude, I'm lucky if I get 5 a bloody week now. It's not on. Just not on. I miss jumping on my ma until she gets so pissed off with me she ends up shreeking like a crazy bit... or tries to smack me ha ha ha stupid lady - I'm bigger, stronger and got the reflexes of a cat meeeow. Anyways yeah, I could list a whole loada peepz who I miss, but I won't...you guys know who you are.
And anyways I've thought about this a lot and have come to the conclusion that I should buy a dog. I'm going to buy a dog and I'm gonna call him Bernard and we're gonna go walking together and watch flicks together and yeah, I'll have mountains of hugs then. And no before yee get the impression I'm going to have dog babies - that isn't going to be part of me and my dog time - human to human is the way forward. Dog and human is just plain creepy. I'm gonna go look up what type of dog I want. Laterez.
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
So I’ve been the target of bad luck lately – seriousooo Lord what have done? I guess you can say these are the things that shape a person – not only did I get batted by a garden gnome on the back of the head BUT the other day, there I was changing my clothes quickly in the toilet after work so I could head on out straight away. Swapped my trousers for jeans and shirt for a T, thought I’d nip quickly out to sort the ol’ hair only to hear the goddamn door slam and when I went back – it had flippin’ locked itself. Bloody typical! The only option I had was to do a miss imposs style hedge jump over from the cubicle on the other side to get all my gear. I'm now sporting two corking bruises! Grrrrr. Serioulsy – why me?
Anyways found me a lil flatty with some cracking peepz and now I’m looking for a jobby. It seems I’m almost unemployable. I’m the man goddamn. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – I would be an asset to any company but I think I’ve got the face that says don’t pick me. Sucks ass. Not sure what I’ll do to be honesto. Keep my chin up is one thing. Something will turn up and when not – I’ll just bum around. Stay here for six months – go travelling. Who the hell cares. I’m still young(ish).
I’m dead happy today, call me sad but I don’t give a…, because I’m wearing my new shoes…furrymuff they’re not like Paolo’s – blue and suede – but hell, which moron would choose blue suede instead of black patent? I luuuuurve the shine. Yep, took me shopping on Saturday and literally visited every shoe shop in Berlin. And of course – I found exactly what I was looking for in the last shop! Dude have you ever bought shoes that make you feel like Dorothy? Well I have and well, I feel like skipping…hell I might even skip to luncheon. Can’t wait for lunchy coz I need a munchy ha ha no really I do. My porridge wasn’t enough for me today and I am now a hungry horse. Not sure what I’ll have today. Decisions decisions.
K lunchy kbye
Anyways found me a lil flatty with some cracking peepz and now I’m looking for a jobby. It seems I’m almost unemployable. I’m the man goddamn. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – I would be an asset to any company but I think I’ve got the face that says don’t pick me. Sucks ass. Not sure what I’ll do to be honesto. Keep my chin up is one thing. Something will turn up and when not – I’ll just bum around. Stay here for six months – go travelling. Who the hell cares. I’m still young(ish).
I’m dead happy today, call me sad but I don’t give a…, because I’m wearing my new shoes…furrymuff they’re not like Paolo’s – blue and suede – but hell, which moron would choose blue suede instead of black patent? I luuuuurve the shine. Yep, took me shopping on Saturday and literally visited every shoe shop in Berlin. And of course – I found exactly what I was looking for in the last shop! Dude have you ever bought shoes that make you feel like Dorothy? Well I have and well, I feel like skipping…hell I might even skip to luncheon. Can’t wait for lunchy coz I need a munchy ha ha no really I do. My porridge wasn’t enough for me today and I am now a hungry horse. Not sure what I’ll have today. Decisions decisions.
K lunchy kbye
Friday, August 15, 2008
I'm sooooooooo blue. Do any of you ever get that? Total sadness for no goddamn reason? Been listening to Queen - underpressure - that might have something to do with it actually. Still my mood is quiet which I like to think isn't like me. I'm supposed to be happy and smiley. I'm the man goddamn ! And have no time for all this malarky. Spoke to my mother dear too, that's probably put me in a stink mood too. That woooman - I swear to the lord she's got magic powers to make me crazy!
Oh sweet mother mary! WHAT A CHUNE! I watched this flick one day with a lovely pal of mine, Tom O'D. The flick was called "Once" set in Dublin and is made raw and when I was watching it, I'm not gonna tell any porkies now, I couldn't wait for it to end until it did and then I didn't want it to end. Yes I am an ejjit who clearly can't appreciate beauty til it's goddamn too late. Anways the flick is about this busker bloke who meets a foreign lady and they make songs together and end up falling in love and it was just all about the beauty of the music and oooo sweet lordy - I was touched. Everything about the movie was incredible. Don't get me wrong, it's no movie I could watch a lot BUT that time it was what I needed and the whole point I've rambled on about this shiz is BEEEEcause I've just this instant stumbled across the soundtrack. Man, I could goddamn cry it's that good. Find it and listen to it do it do it do it barcardi 'n' cola do it. I think I'm bumming myself out again. Ok happy moooozak from now, let's put a bit of Marvin Gaye on - oh -can't - tear - my - self - away - from - sad - beautiful - music! Right ok all goood, I'm bad to a bit of sanity. There's nothing like a bit of Pendulum! Love the man in the "slam" viddy...it's actually where I get most of my moves from ha ha ha jokes jokes but not really.
I tell ya what, that Slam viddy is bloomin' awesome. I love that fatty just going for it on the street, tie round the ol' noggin like he's the goddamn karate kid and shakin his a belly with his butt crack out - classy bird yeah. ha ha love it. love it. K bored I'm off.
Oh sweet mother mary! WHAT A CHUNE! I watched this flick one day with a lovely pal of mine, Tom O'D. The flick was called "Once" set in Dublin and is made raw and when I was watching it, I'm not gonna tell any porkies now, I couldn't wait for it to end until it did and then I didn't want it to end. Yes I am an ejjit who clearly can't appreciate beauty til it's goddamn too late. Anways the flick is about this busker bloke who meets a foreign lady and they make songs together and end up falling in love and it was just all about the beauty of the music and oooo sweet lordy - I was touched. Everything about the movie was incredible. Don't get me wrong, it's no movie I could watch a lot BUT that time it was what I needed and the whole point I've rambled on about this shiz is BEEEEcause I've just this instant stumbled across the soundtrack. Man, I could goddamn cry it's that good. Find it and listen to it do it do it do it barcardi 'n' cola do it. I think I'm bumming myself out again. Ok happy moooozak from now, let's put a bit of Marvin Gaye on - oh -can't - tear - my - self - away - from - sad - beautiful - music! Right ok all goood, I'm bad to a bit of sanity. There's nothing like a bit of Pendulum! Love the man in the "slam" viddy...it's actually where I get most of my moves from ha ha ha jokes jokes but not really.
I tell ya what, that Slam viddy is bloomin' awesome. I love that fatty just going for it on the street, tie round the ol' noggin like he's the goddamn karate kid and shakin his a belly with his butt crack out - classy bird yeah. ha ha love it. love it. K bored I'm off.
Well well well, I have no idea why I get sooooo incredibly creative and thoughtful in the ol office (or at any other convenient time as a matter of fact). But I find myself once again – typing away like there’s no tomorrow about all the bloomin’ crap that spins around in my head.
It dawned on me last night before I went to bed and just before I walked face first into my flippin’ bathroom door and cracked my schnozzle one! That I am in fact Black Beauty.
You see, I am naturally a super happy, enthusiastic and positive person who wants to succeed in the areas that mean a lot to me. I don’t think I could live with myself if I didn’t give it my all each and every time – it just ain’t who I am. So my role currently is not fulfilling my needs of achievement. AND according to the ever so wise Maslow (he's the geezer we learnt about in business studies who chatted on about worker needs and motivations) – anyways my needs need to be met and then will I be once again perky perkerson. But until then, I’m crumbling inside. That’s why I’m like Black Beauty.
You see Black Beauty was this fine specimen of a horse, playing in the field, galloping about the place until he got taken away, sold, beaten, worked to the bone and almost starved to death before he got saved. I’m at the beaten and starved stage right now. I fear it couldn’t get any worse – unless I got smacked with a garden gnome again and that would just be plain unlucky. My once lively spirit of playing in the fields has been broken, just like good ol’ Blacky’s. I am waiting for a sign, something, anything to swing my way and bring me out of this crushing, soul destroying feeling of dismay, sadness and sheer disappointment.
Ok so maybe I’m being a wee drastic but I gota do something. I need to find a way, find my feet and flippin’ stay positive. Lord knows what might happen otherwise!
Quick question – is Black Beauty a boy or girl?
I’m back on the water challenge again. I did it all last year when I had what was probably THE worst time of my life. This little daily challenge used to keep my very occupied indeedio. I’d drink lots and pee lots which equates to optimum time wasting. Plan batman yeah. Well. It was a plan until I read about drinking so much that you drown your body – so I’m playing the “careful” water challenge now. So far I’m 1.5 litres down, got me a nice big round belly brimming with water and I won’t lie, I’m feeling a bit queasy. It’s going well though, I’m up from yesters – it’s only half three so there’s plenty more downing time available.
Luncheon was a chore today. Went to this canteen where I had to eat some nasty sauce. I don’t know why but since I’ve become chef man bing, I don’t enjoy eating out as much because I can taste all the crap that restaurants put in food to make it taste “yummy”. It’s all a loads of bollocks, I cook well nice fresh food without none of this butter, salt…schmatever malarkey. It’s actually costing me an arm and a leg eating out every day but it’s the only piece of sanity I get from my sheltered and lonely and extremely mind numbingly boring day.
I often wonder how the devil I manage to get myself into such situations. I mean, I end up doing things which I despise and how – I’ll tell you how – because I’m a big berk. Yep, 100% berk in my blood. I wish I knew what I wanted to do with myself rather than constantly doing things I bloomin’ can’t stand. I’m in one of those moods where I beat myself up, mentally of course – physically would be a quite a challenge don’t you think. Anyways, yeah. Work sucks because I want to do my own thing but I need experience of the business world. Grrr.
Going out tonight too which I can't wait for, have me some wine – a glass or two, maybe three. Put it this way I want me to be nice and merry! I've made a really great friend. In fact I haven't had such a phat friend -who is a girl I might add in there - since I was 16. And now in my wise old age, I recognise that it's not particularly healthy to be around blokes and only blokes 24/7. Sure they're fun and all but the lad humour and shallowness can really get a girl down every once in a while. So I've learned. But this lass is awesome. Love her humour and love how it's easy to be around her and I goddamn wish that there were more girls like that around. I'm going to be heartbroken when she has to go back to uni and I have to keep doing what I'm doing - who will I laze about with all day in Mauerpark!!! I’ll have to bloomin’ lie around on my toddy and we all know that just isn’t any fun.
Ooooo I’m a bad babysitter… guess who’s eating a whole load of peanut M&Ms! ME. Promised myself no sweeties in worky BUT they’re saving me from eternal bordom. I like to nibble all the choccy off and then munch away on the peeeanut. Man I love peanuts. Dunno why, but I do. Oh I like almonds too and cashews- mmmm I luuurve cashews. I like having one cashew nut with like 3 raisins - perfecto combo. Tastes increders. Now I'm singing "I like cashews I like cashews" over and over and over in my head. I’m going to buy some on the way home. Sweet Lord, I can’t wait to go home. I’m calling my pops tonight too. Just can’t wait. The guy is a LEGEND. I actually miss him immensely. He’s just so goddamn awesome. Alrighty, I’ve got pee – goddamn water.
It dawned on me last night before I went to bed and just before I walked face first into my flippin’ bathroom door and cracked my schnozzle one! That I am in fact Black Beauty.
You see, I am naturally a super happy, enthusiastic and positive person who wants to succeed in the areas that mean a lot to me. I don’t think I could live with myself if I didn’t give it my all each and every time – it just ain’t who I am. So my role currently is not fulfilling my needs of achievement. AND according to the ever so wise Maslow (he's the geezer we learnt about in business studies who chatted on about worker needs and motivations) – anyways my needs need to be met and then will I be once again perky perkerson. But until then, I’m crumbling inside. That’s why I’m like Black Beauty.
You see Black Beauty was this fine specimen of a horse, playing in the field, galloping about the place until he got taken away, sold, beaten, worked to the bone and almost starved to death before he got saved. I’m at the beaten and starved stage right now. I fear it couldn’t get any worse – unless I got smacked with a garden gnome again and that would just be plain unlucky. My once lively spirit of playing in the fields has been broken, just like good ol’ Blacky’s. I am waiting for a sign, something, anything to swing my way and bring me out of this crushing, soul destroying feeling of dismay, sadness and sheer disappointment.
Ok so maybe I’m being a wee drastic but I gota do something. I need to find a way, find my feet and flippin’ stay positive. Lord knows what might happen otherwise!
Quick question – is Black Beauty a boy or girl?
I’m back on the water challenge again. I did it all last year when I had what was probably THE worst time of my life. This little daily challenge used to keep my very occupied indeedio. I’d drink lots and pee lots which equates to optimum time wasting. Plan batman yeah. Well. It was a plan until I read about drinking so much that you drown your body – so I’m playing the “careful” water challenge now. So far I’m 1.5 litres down, got me a nice big round belly brimming with water and I won’t lie, I’m feeling a bit queasy. It’s going well though, I’m up from yesters – it’s only half three so there’s plenty more downing time available.
Luncheon was a chore today. Went to this canteen where I had to eat some nasty sauce. I don’t know why but since I’ve become chef man bing, I don’t enjoy eating out as much because I can taste all the crap that restaurants put in food to make it taste “yummy”. It’s all a loads of bollocks, I cook well nice fresh food without none of this butter, salt…schmatever malarkey. It’s actually costing me an arm and a leg eating out every day but it’s the only piece of sanity I get from my sheltered and lonely and extremely mind numbingly boring day.
I often wonder how the devil I manage to get myself into such situations. I mean, I end up doing things which I despise and how – I’ll tell you how – because I’m a big berk. Yep, 100% berk in my blood. I wish I knew what I wanted to do with myself rather than constantly doing things I bloomin’ can’t stand. I’m in one of those moods where I beat myself up, mentally of course – physically would be a quite a challenge don’t you think. Anyways, yeah. Work sucks because I want to do my own thing but I need experience of the business world. Grrr.
Going out tonight too which I can't wait for, have me some wine – a glass or two, maybe three. Put it this way I want me to be nice and merry! I've made a really great friend. In fact I haven't had such a phat friend -who is a girl I might add in there - since I was 16. And now in my wise old age, I recognise that it's not particularly healthy to be around blokes and only blokes 24/7. Sure they're fun and all but the lad humour and shallowness can really get a girl down every once in a while. So I've learned. But this lass is awesome. Love her humour and love how it's easy to be around her and I goddamn wish that there were more girls like that around. I'm going to be heartbroken when she has to go back to uni and I have to keep doing what I'm doing - who will I laze about with all day in Mauerpark!!! I’ll have to bloomin’ lie around on my toddy and we all know that just isn’t any fun.
Ooooo I’m a bad babysitter… guess who’s eating a whole load of peanut M&Ms! ME. Promised myself no sweeties in worky BUT they’re saving me from eternal bordom. I like to nibble all the choccy off and then munch away on the peeeanut. Man I love peanuts. Dunno why, but I do. Oh I like almonds too and cashews- mmmm I luuurve cashews. I like having one cashew nut with like 3 raisins - perfecto combo. Tastes increders. Now I'm singing "I like cashews I like cashews" over and over and over in my head. I’m going to buy some on the way home. Sweet Lord, I can’t wait to go home. I’m calling my pops tonight too. Just can’t wait. The guy is a LEGEND. I actually miss him immensely. He’s just so goddamn awesome. Alrighty, I’ve got pee – goddamn water.
Thursday, August 14, 2008
I just got a blog, well ok, last week I "just" got a blog BUT I've just plucked up some courage to write something...not that I'm sure where I actually should be writing. I guess that's one the tricky things about being a blonde - you never quite know what's going on - even when its point blank obvious. Yep we blondes have our pros and our cons, our ups and our downs and we defo (almost) always prove all those brunettes wrong because we DO have more fun!
I sharn't say anymore over this debate...
Anyways, here I am stuck at work, doing nothing, and it's painfully soul crushing. You know the saying - little fish in a big pond? Well I'm about the size a piece of plankton in this pond. Fair enough I'm only a placement student but shaaaamon now - throw me a frikkin' bone here - I gota learn a lil somethin' somethin'!! I'm like " hey - I'm a person too, I can do that, I wana do that, help me do that!!!!" Companies should be taking care of those fresh minded, enthusiastic and intelligent graduates (like me) ! I can't wait to branch out and spead my wings MY WAY!!!
Speaking of branches, yesters on my way home you won't believe what the devil happend to me. A tree branch (I should call it killer tree branch! Because it was about the size of my arm!!!) landed on the ground about a metre in front of me. Lads, I might not be here today if that hit me! Lets all take a minute to thank the big man upstairs for watching over Sara J. Because he clearly wasn't thinking about me the week before when I got smacked on the back of the head but a bloody garden gnome that got blown off a balcony in the storms. I got a concussion and everything. Lost a few very precious brain cells and it's resulted in me still suffering with headaches which SUCK! I. HATE. HEADACHES! I swear there are little men in my head marching around, banging on my veins and just in general causing me more pain than I deserve!
I still can't see the funny side of a garden gnome smacking me one on the back of the head probably at terminal velocity in spite of all the pillocks telling me its hilarious. It's tragically funny in my eyes and I doubt I'll ever change my mind on that.
I sharn't say anymore over this debate...
Anyways, here I am stuck at work, doing nothing, and it's painfully soul crushing. You know the saying - little fish in a big pond? Well I'm about the size a piece of plankton in this pond. Fair enough I'm only a placement student but shaaaamon now - throw me a frikkin' bone here - I gota learn a lil somethin' somethin'!! I'm like " hey - I'm a person too, I can do that, I wana do that, help me do that!!!!" Companies should be taking care of those fresh minded, enthusiastic and intelligent graduates (like me) ! I can't wait to branch out and spead my wings MY WAY!!!
Speaking of branches, yesters on my way home you won't believe what the devil happend to me. A tree branch (I should call it killer tree branch! Because it was about the size of my arm!!!) landed on the ground about a metre in front of me. Lads, I might not be here today if that hit me! Lets all take a minute to thank the big man upstairs for watching over Sara J. Because he clearly wasn't thinking about me the week before when I got smacked on the back of the head but a bloody garden gnome that got blown off a balcony in the storms. I got a concussion and everything. Lost a few very precious brain cells and it's resulted in me still suffering with headaches which SUCK! I. HATE. HEADACHES! I swear there are little men in my head marching around, banging on my veins and just in general causing me more pain than I deserve!
I still can't see the funny side of a garden gnome smacking me one on the back of the head probably at terminal velocity in spite of all the pillocks telling me its hilarious. It's tragically funny in my eyes and I doubt I'll ever change my mind on that.
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